Grandma goes Bowling with Grandsons

On Sunday I was feeling a little sad.  It was my husband's birthday Friday.  Tom has been gone 4 1/2 years now and sometimes sadness overwhelms me...it creeps up on me when I least expect it.  I try to shake off the feeling plus I keep telling myself that I have to live for the present.  Feeling blue only has one solution...grabbing a grandchild or two makes the blues immediately subside, so I decided to grab my two grandsons and go bowling.  It just so happened that my office was having a supper/bowling party and everyone, including grandchildren, were invited.

After church, I headed for my daughter, Mandy's house (yes, I'm the only one who calls my daughter Mandy and I will continue to my dying breath calling her Mandy!).  I needed a "Mandy moment" where I could stop and have tea and converse with my sweetheart of a daughter.  That always makes me feel good when I can talk with her; after all, she's my best friend.  As I open up the door to her garage, I notice no cars are there.  My heart drops...where are they?  I need a grandma moment and a Mandy moment.  Where are they?  I get into the car and decide to go hunt for them.  Just as I start the car, my daughter drives into the yard.  As I sigh loudly, I think of how blessed I am to have this wonderful family in my midst. As I head into the house with my daughter and grandsons, I am talking a mile a minute about the bowling party and asking Noah and Abram to go bowling with me.  Abram (4 years old) immediately says, "Grandma. me go with you!"  Noah (8 years old going on 12!), on the other hand, has to always think a few minutes and ask lots of questions to determine what he's going to do.

After two cups of tea and conversing with my daughter, it was time to go.  Abram bounded out the door with his giraffe in tow and Noah followed soon after.  As I was driving home, I winked at Noah (our secret code) that we all must lay down for a nap because grandma was tired.  Now Noah has been through this little scenario before and knows that when I wink, he chimes in that he is going to go for a nap because he's tired, too.  He knows that once Abram gets into the bedroom and closes the door, Noah can immediately get up and start playing.  Noah loves the "alone" time where he can play and watch TV without any interruptions.

Soon Abram is sleeping and I get up and begin to wrap all of the gifts for Christmas.  Every year I give the kids and grandchildren wicker totes which contain everyone's Christmas gifts.  That way they have something to transport their treasures home plus they can use them for storage.  It's a very efficient process when everyone opens all of their stocking stuffs from their totes and then immediately put everything back into these totes and carry them home.  No fuss...no mess!

As I was wrapping the Christmas gifts, I told Noah that Santa had already been to grandma's house but that Santa had to leave them unwrapped with me because he didn't have time to wrap them.  After all, I explained to him, Santa has an entire world to deliver gifts to!  Noah looked at me and I knew the wheels were turning in his head.  How could Santa come to grandma's house first?  Noah quickly asked me if I had seen Santa.  I quickly answered, "Sure, haven't you seen Santa?"  Noah replied, "No, but I bet he wears a red suit and is fat!"  I laughed.  Out of the mouth of children!

After I wrapped all of the gifts, I quickly woke Abram up and we went across the street to the bowling alley.  We ate to our hearts content and then decided to begin bowling.  Noah told the owner what size his shoes were.  He had been bowling the day before and was feeling like an expert.  Abram, on the other hand, was watching Noah like a hawk.  He knew he should watch his brother and do everything just like Noah!  As Noah strutted up to the bowling lane, I was surprised to see how mature he was.  He threw that ball so hard and actually did a great job bowling.  Abram, other the other hand, needed grandma's help carrying the ball to the bowling area.  As Abram threw the ball down the alley, he would sprawl out on the lane waiting for his ball to hit the pins.  What a cute little pose!  Again I thanked God for the wonderful day he had given me thanks to these wonderful grandchildren.  Before we knew it, the two games of bowling were ended.  Noah and Abram quickly turned in their bowling shoes and asked me, "Grandma can we come again?"  I thought, "Why not...let's do it again."  It helps being across the street from the bowling alley.  I think we'll have to go more frequently now that I see my grandsons are so good at bowling!

I have come to the conclusion that being a grandma is one of God's biggest blessings.  What more can anyone ask from life when they watch their grandchildren grow up.  Grandparents are truly blessed!

Grandma or the Quilt!

Once upon a time there was a grandma who decided she was going to start sewing her grandchildren quilts for their beds...not just any quilts, but quilts filled with lots of love.  How hard could it be??!!  She decided to start with her granddaughter's quilt first.  She asked her granddaughter, Annika, what was her favorite color.  "Purple," exclaimed Annika.   So Grandma Pat set out to the fabric store.  Upon entering the fabric store, Grandma Pat was in absolute awe looking at all of the rows of bright colored fabric and touching all of the beautiful patterns and colors.   Grandma Pat didn't have a clue how much fabric to buy so she just purchased three yards of every pattern and color.  Now for a quilt pattern (she didn't realize that you buy the pattern first and it would tell you how much fabric to buy!). She went over to the quilting section and after thorough examination of the patterns, Grandma Pat decided they looked too complicated and she didn't have a clue how to read the patterns, so she decided she would "wing" that part and make up her own pattern.  After all, how hard could making a quilt be?? (Ya right!).   She ambled out of the fabric store feeling very happy and content.  As she was sitting on the couch that evening, she decided she should started watching quilting shows to get advice and learn a few things.  While watching the experts on these quilting shows, Grandma decided she needed more information on how to sew the quilt for her granddaughter, so she went into Helen's Fabrics and learned there was a quilt club in Morris.  How lucky could she be!  She quickly called one of the members and asked to join.  After all, how hard could quilting be??  For her first class in quilting, Grandma Pat brought her sewing machine to the morning quilting class.  She came into the class feeling apprehensive but excited because after all, how hard could quilting be??  She proceeded to sit down at a table and the instructor told her to put the quilting foot on her machine so she could quilt.  Grandma Pat looked at the instructor with horror.  She felt like a deer with headlights shining in her eyes.  She didn't have any idea what piece of equipment the instructor was telling her to put on her machine.  What was she going to do!  Grandma Pat quickly scanned the class trying to find someone who had the same sewing machine.  Luckily, she found a fellow quilter and learned what the quilting foot looked like.  One hurdle gone, onto another.  The instructor proceeded to teach how to "meander" on a quilt. Grandma Pat didn't even know what the word meant let alone how to do it!   She was feeling a little overwhelmed at this point but figured everyone was in the same boat and she would need to know this information if she was going to continue to sew her granddaughter's quilt.  After breaking two needles and almost having one of the needles go through grandma's finger, she finally got the skill of "meandering" on a quilt.  Actually, she was quite good!  After all, how hard can quilting be??!!  After the class Grandma Pat went home and continued sewing on her quilt.  Days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months.  Grandma Pat lovingly sewed her granddaughter's quilt every available minute thinking to herself, "How hard can quilting be???"  One day Grandma Pat decided to measure the quilt on the twin bed.  She gazed at it in horror as the quilt was too long and narrow and out of proportion!  How was she going to make the quilt wider for the bed?  She couldn't just sew the sides.  She knew she had to sew in equal portions around the quilt.  Hmmmm...time to call another quilter so Grandma Pat got out the old, trusty telephone book and started dialing for help!  Another quilter from the quilting club came over and proceeded to figure out the dimensions she should have for the quilt and how to proceed.  After all, how hard can quilting be???  After two hours of excruciating calculations, both grandmas came up with a solution and Pat proceeded to lovingly begin sewing her granddaughter's quilt again.  After all, how hard can quilting be??  The moral of this story is to keep going on any project in our lives even though there are obstacles. These are the goals and projects we have set out to do in life. Put your head down and stick to the task. You become a better person and learn through these challenges in life.  You arrive at your chosen goal or destination and feel a sense of accomplishment.  After all, how hard can life be??  

Another widow is born

As I slowly turned the chilly door knob of the funeral home to go to Dave Schmidgall's visitation, all of the memories came back of four years ago when I was in the same place as Janet (Dave's widow).  A shudder came over me and I took a deep breath.  This was going to be very difficult.  Dave was 50 when he died; Tom, my husband, was 53.  Not much difference in age but thankfully, our children were grown.  

As I meandered through the visitation line waiting to wish my condolences to the family, I stood by a neighbor who asked me, "How are you?"  Instinctively, I told him that "I was good."  I didn't tell him that I dreaded being in this funeral home because it brought back so many sad memories.  I tried to concentrate on Janet and her children, but my mind would wander again to four years ago.  I thought of all of the long hours Janet and her children would be standing in line with all of the people.  I knew the faces would become blurred, names would go through Janet's head but later she wouldn't remember everyone who was there because of the suddenness and shock of Dave's death.  I knew Janet was trying to be strong for Rachel and Martha and yet grieve for her lost husband.  Janet would no longer have a partner who knew what she was thinking before she said it.  She would no longer have a husband to share things about their children.  She could no longer call her husband on the phone to share info about the kids and little things that were happening. The loneliness would be a big factor, too.  Her soul mate had died and taken a piece of her hearth with him.  

As I was deep in thought, I suddenly realized it was my turn now to go through the line of family and wish them my deepest sympathy.  As I approached Ruth Ann, Janet's sister and my daughter's lifelong friend, I could see she was crying. I pulled her close and gave her a big motherly hug wishing I could take away the pain from this family.  As I moved up the line, I approached Karen, Janet's mom, who opened up her arms and gave me the biggest hug.  She whispered in my ear, "You know how it is."  I just shook my head up and down.  I couldn't speak because I did know how it was and a tear slowly began running down my cheek.  As I quickly brushed the tear away, I thought of how I have survived without my husband and the loneliness that is always there.  Janet will feel this loneliness, too, but she will cope as I do each day.  She will keep moving on in life for her children and herself.  Slowly time will heal a part of her heart that is raw and hurting.

I know God is there for Janet, her children and her family.  Karen, Janet’s mom, explained it better than anyone could.  She said, “God has a reason for this.”  Maybe someday people will figure it out and understand why God works in mysterious ways.   I know God’s love will give Janet and her family inner peace and help them move on in life.   God does things in HIS time, not ours and we must understand this in order to find that inner peace that everyone longs for and truly does exist.   

Sadness Today

There are times in a person's life where there is sadness and today is one of them.  Last night my daughter called and told me the sad news that a friend had died.  That special person was Dave Schmidgall.  Let me tell you a little bit about Dave..  When I think of one word to describe this man, I think of kind.  He would do anything for anyone in need.  His exuberant energy was always present and he had the biggest, ever-present smile.  He also could talk about anything and everything and invited everyone to converse with him.  God, his family and friends were an integral part of his life.  That's why I think he was prepared in every way to go to this wonderful place called heaven.

I also think of Janet, Rachel and Martha (his wife and children).  You can never prepare for death as a spouse or child.  Death comes unexpectedly in the night and what do you do as a survivor?  How do you cope with your husband and father suddenly gone?  Going through the grieving process is very difficult but necessary to heal.

Let me explain to you a little bit about grieving.  Grieving is a personal and different experience for everyone. How you grieve depends on your personality and how you cope in life.  It also depends on our faith.  When my husband died, faith, family and friends were so important and got me through the grieving process.  It's still going on and it's been four years.  My point is that there is no timetable for grieving.  It can't be measured in months or years.  I think the most important factor about a person grieving is that as a friend or family member, you must allow the process to happen naturally.

Janet, Rachel and Martha...I shall pray for you and try to help you in any way possible.  You are very special people and will go on as Dave would want you to.  Always remember that love is stronger than death and those loving memories of Dave will always be with you.

Another beautiful day!

I look outside and feel so blessed!  I can hardly believe it when I go outside for lunch and am still able to sit on the picnic table by work and just enjoy the sun. 

Schweeber2

Prince Tom Cat

I now have two cats thanks to my two grandsons.  One is named Schweeber2 and the other is Prince Tom Cat.  Schweeber2 is a hellion and Prince Tom Cat is the most easy-going cat you have ever met.  Schweeber2 hisses, growls and spits at Prince Tom Cat every time she comes into the house and sees Prince Tom.  I know eventually they will get to be friends but for now, Schweeber2 dislikes Prince Tom Cat immensely!  Prince Tom just sits there and looks at Schweeber when she has a meltdown.  I wonder what he's thinking.  Prince Tom has been an outdoor cat for two years so his present life at my house is heaven!  He just sits, eats and sleeps and has no worries about freezing to death!  I really love them both and hope that they will get to be friends soon before winter.  I came home for lunch at noon and Schweeber2 came in from the garage as I was leaving for work, so I left her inside the house.  I wonder what I'll see when I get home.  Maybe a cat who's had a nervous breakdown!

Great Day!

Today is a great day!  It's beautiful weather and the sun is shining.  It doesn't get any better than that!

Every Tuesday after work,  I have the privilege of fixing supper for my daughter and her children.  I then take my grandson to piano where I wait intently for him to begin playing the piano.  What a joy to have this special time with him.  I  enjoy it so much! I then come home and play with my other grandson until his mom tells all of us, "It's time to go."  I am so fortunate that they live near me.  I think God has truly blessed me in this respect.

I am so blessed to have three grandchildren.  Their little smiles truly capture my heart!

Anniversary Yesterday

It was "our" anniversary yesterday.   It would have been 37 years.  My girlfriends all tell me when their anniversary is and never realize that I envy them so much.  I wish I could have one more anniversary.  I wish I could have one more moment with Tom.  Tom always said wishes are like turds.  I guess he's right!  Today is another day.

Granny on the move

Okay...if my daughter can do this blog thing, then so can grandma!  I am a grandma who likes to learn new things, loves to text, enjoys traveling and is a granny on the move!  I am going this weekend with other grannies to a wedding and we are going to enjoy life to its fullest.  I have learned throughout life that you can choose to have the glass half empty or half full.  It's alot more fun having the glass half full.  Sure, you may have "one of those days."  But it takes one of those bad days to appreciate the good days or so I keep telling myself!  I am so blessed to have three wonderful grandchildren and my children.  If I have moments when I feel sad, I just grab a grandchild for a hug.  Grannies always need lots of hugs!  If you're a woman of the 21st century, you don't let any grass grow under your feet and you enjoy life to the fullest!  That's me and I'm proud of it!