Valentine's Day is a special time where you show your love to your sweetheart/spouse. On this occasion you let them know how much you mean to them. Sadly, to widows Valentine's Day is a painful reminder of the loss we have endured. Instead of feeling badly every Valentine's Day and staying home by myself, I decided to get a group of widows from the Morris area together so we wouldn't feel so alone on Valentine's Day. This is now the fourth Valentine's Day that the "widows group" (I call it) get together and we usually talk about our spouses and remember all of the wonderful Valentine's Days that we spent together.
One such special Valentine's Day was in 2006, when my husband Tom gave me a special surprise. Little did I know it would be the last Valentine's Day surprise I would ever receive. We were on our way to church on Sunday, February 12 and Tom said he wanted my undivided attention after church because we were going to celebrate Valentine's Day today even though the true holiday was on a Tuesday. He wanted to go out and spend time just with me. I looked at him wondering what he was up to because he never made a big deal out of Valentine's Day. Instead of questioning him, I just shrugged my shoulders and said, "Okay dear." A typical Valentine's Day would be Tom and I exchanging cards and going out to dinner on Valentine's Day or the weekend before it. That was it. After 32 years of marriage, you get "comfortable" with each other and you do the same thing over and over. But this Valentine's Day was different. This Valentine's Day weekend Tom wanted to go to Alexandria and give me a special surprise. Little did I know that this would be one of the best Valentine's surprises ever (and the last). As we were driving to Alexandria after church, Tom was unusually talkative with little conversations and even asking me where I would like to go for our special Valentine's dinner. Now my husband was always very quiet and never said much of anything. He just usually listened. Not on this day, however. After much conversation, Tom and I agreed that our special meal would be at Kentucky Fried Chicken. This was always our favorite haunt when we went to Alexandria and had dinner. After eating our special meal (it was special to us even though it was KFC), we ambled out of the restaurant, getting into our car. I thought we would head back home. Instead, Tom started driving in the opposite direction to Paffrath Jewelry in a little strip mall in Alexandria. As we approached Paffrath's, I noticed Tom had the biggest smile on his face. I kept thinking, "I wonder what he's up to?" We went into the store and Tom immediately looked around for a sales person. She asked if she could help us. I stood there in silence not knowing what to expect. Tom leaned over the display case and said to the clerk, "My wife can pick anything she wants for Valentine's Day." I was dumbstruck! I had never experienced this side of Tom before. I could spend any amount of money on myself that I wanted! No way! Tom slowly made his way around all of the display cases asking me if I like necklaces, rings or earrings. I was so astounded, I simply remarked, "You pick something out dear." I had no idea what he had in mind. Then he went to the display case where the necklaces were. He asked the sales woman to pick out three necklaces she thought were nice. She happily agreed and put three necklaces on the top of the display case. Tom looked at me and smiled and said, "Honey, pick whatever you would like." I looked at him and thought to myself, "I am in a dream." I studied each necklace trying to decide which one I would like. This was a special moment and I knew it so I wanted to savor every moment and make it last as long as possible. After much thought, I picked out a beautiful necklace that was handmade by the owner himself. Tom took the necklace and put it around my neck. I felt like I was in a dream. Never had Tom gone to such lengths to surprise me. As we were walking out of the store, Tom put his hand in mine and said, "Happy Valentine's Day, honey." This was the best Valentine's Day ever!
A few words of advice...as the years go by in your marriage, remember that you must never take each other for granted. Take time to appreciate each other and hold onto every moment. Life is very fragile and we must cherish every day. Happy Valentine's Day.
